Imposter Syndrome: Too hard on myself?

I've been feeling a little disconnected from the Treehouse Community recently. Mostly because I've had a recent upturn in web design work that I've been focusing on in the last few weeks so haven't had a lot of time to look in on the Community and help out as much as I'd like. It's been tiring work but clients come first :)

There is, however, something that I've been wanting to share and I feel like now is the right time. It's another one about a common thing we experience as designers and developers... all the time. Possibly more than we like to admit. Imposter Syndrome. and though I'm early on into Python Development here at Treehouse, it has struck me in the last few days.

Here's what it's like.

Sometimes I think I'm hard on myself. I keep finding myself saying to myself "Stop this, you can't do it." My reasoning for this my brain isn't sharp enough to figure out problems on my own. (Spoiler: It is, I just have to work at it harder than the average person)

But even if I listen to the angel in me (let's say that the devil is the "I can't do it" and the angel is the "spoiler").. sometimes it all comes to a head and I need to take a little break. And for various reasons I need more time to practice and try and make it all sink in... but I don't have it.

Our teachers do a fantastic job and explaining the concepts and walking through the code we need to know. For example.

In Python Collections in the video.... towards the end, Kenneth encourages us to try working on parts of Dungeon game we're building on our own before watching the next, or the rest of the video.

Kenneth has complete confidence in us (as he should) and thinks we can do it. I'm not casting any aspersions on the abilities of others or on his judgment. But when this happens the devil makes an appearance. Maybe it's because I still lack confidence in myself; maybe it's because I haven't practiced or understood the concepts enough to try on my own... but in moments like this... that's when the devil comes out the most "No, I don't think I can do this... show me more".

My brain get's overwhelmed very easily

I'm sure this is a very simple piece of code in reality.. but I need to absorb this map twice over at least before I get it

def draw_map(player):
    print(" _"*5)
    tile = "|{}"

    for cell in CELLS:
        x,y = cell
        if x < 4:
            line_end = ""
            if cell == player:
                output = tile.format("X")
            else:
                output = tile.format("_")
        else:
            line_end = "\n"
            if cell == player:
                output = tile.format("X|")
            else:
                output = tile.format("_|")
        print(output, end = line_end)

It's not necessarily the writing of the code that's the work... it's the understanding.. the work it takes just to wrap my head around what is being taught. It can make a hill seem more like a mountain.

Now I have my difficulties and if he thinks we can do it, we probably can. But I just think to myself "Woaaah! No, I can't, I can't even engage my brain to think as a problem solver"

I will always keep going but am I being too hard on myself and how can I stop doubting myself through this long journey in the world of tech? :)

Thanks :)